I was turned off by religion early in life. My hatred developed in enthusiasm and I became a devout atheist.
I would incite debates and enjoy mocking people that had faith in God. I claimed to believe in Darwinism and Neo Darwinism, but deep inside I still had questions.
I started thinking: “If this is all there is, why bother living any longer?” I began to immerse myself in pleasure mistaking that for happiness. This only led to a deep depression.
One, day, I met a vibrant young Christian and as I was attacking his faith, to prove a point against Christ, I pulled out my big “Anti-Christian” Book to quote why Christ was not really the Son of God. When I opened the book—all the pages turned WHITE. Even my handwritten notes in the books’ margins were all WHIPED OUT! I was shocked. To this day, when I think about it, my hair stands on end.
I felt like it was God Himself who was saying to me: “Gasen, who do you think you re trying to wipe me out? I wipe out all your “proofs”.
That night, as I tried to sleep, I could not. I called out to God. “I don’t know who you are. I have attacked you in many ways. I am not good. I do not deserve your grace. Please forgive me for all the bad things I have done. Please take my life and make it over.”
Instantly, I felt the presence of God in the room filling mw with Joy. I felt like I was floating I was so happy and clean! I felt like Jesus Himself was hugging me. I slept for two hours and woke up a new person.
Life, people, the world, it all looked better to me. I had a reason to live. I began to tell everyone I knew that there really was a God. They were stunned since I was so previously against God before.
Since the day God changed me, many of my family have come to know Him as well. For those who doubt—faith takes a leap. You must reach out and really open your heart to God.