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Weekly Christian Devotionals - Prayer - Verses - Testimonials / Relationship Quotes: Humor to get through it!

Relationship Quotes: Humor to get through it!

Written by Julia Shalom Jordan.Posted in Relationship QuotesTagged: funny quotes, quotes about family, quotes about friendship, quotes about love, quotes about relationships

“The right person at the wrong time can feel like the wrong person at ANY time.” – Michelle McKInney Hammond

‎”Age does not protect us from love, But love to some extent protects us from age.” – Bob Moody

“Learn to express rather than impress.  
Expressing evokes a ‘me too’ attitude while impressing evokes a ‘so what’ attitude.”- 
E. James Rohn

“Bitterness is the trap that snares the hunter.”- Max Lucado

“Those who marry for money end up EARNING it anyway.”- Dr. Phil

“Develop an ‘attitude of gratitude.’ 
Say thank you to everyone you meet for everything they do for you.”- 
Brian Tracy

“We must learn to help those who deserve it, not just those who need it. 
Life responds to deserve not need.”- 
Jim Rohn

“There is a little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. 
That little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.”-
W. Clement Stone

“Our attitude towards others determines their attitude towards us.”-
Earl Nightingale

“Forgiveness FEELS good, for everyone.”- Julia Shalom Jordan

“Say I love you with your DO.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Forbidden fruit is usually rotten on the inside.”- Julia Shalom Jordan

“The function of all relationships is to make YOU grow.”- Michelle McKinney Hammond

“Having everything your way is highly overrated.”- Joyce Meyer

“Since love grows within you, so beauty grows. For love is the beauty of the soul.” St. Augustine

“It is not easy being a mom.  If it were, fathers would do it.”- Unknown

“United we stand, divided we fall.”  George Washington

“Character is the sustenance of love.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Love is like heaven, but it can hurt like hell.” -Bob Moody

“The right person at the wrong time can feel like the wrong person at ANY time.” – Michelle McKInney Hammond

“The happiest people are less forgetting and more forgiving.”- Unknown

“When a person sends out hate and it is met with love, there is no contest.  Love is the strongest force on earth.” P. B. Wilson

“Marriage is sacrifice, commitment and work.  But, anything worth anything, always is.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Bitterness is the trap that snares the hunter.”- Max Lucado

“Forbidden fruit is usually rotten on the inside.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Lord, when we are wrong, make us willing to change, and when we are right make us easy to live with.” – Peter Marshall

‎”Love is when hurting her will hurt you more.”-Unknown

“It’s not how much we do, but how much love we put in the doing. It is not how much we give, but how much love we put in the giving.” – Mother Teresa

“You have to work to keep love alive; you have to protect it and maintain it, just like you would a delicate flower.”- James Dobson

“For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds 
of peace of mind” -Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Some people come into our lives, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never the same.”-Bob Moody

“Until it costs you to love someone, you haven’t really loved them.”- Sergio DeLaMora

“Marriage is sacrifice, commitment and work.  But, anything worth anything, always is.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“True love is not based on luck.  It is a choice and it is a gift.  How will you take care of that gift?” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Don’t trade what you want most for what you want at this moment.” – Unknown

“Age does not protect us from love, But love to some extent protects us from age.” – Bob Moody

“Wives-A fed man won’t be digging through garbage.”- Julia Shalom Jordan

“Love is not a matter of counting the years… But making the years count.” Michelle St. Amand

“If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;be honest anyway.

“What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; build anyway.If you find serenity and happiness, there may be jealousy; be happy anyway.” – Unknown

“The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; be good anyway.Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough; give the world the best you’ve got anyway.You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God; it was never between you and them anyway.” – Mother Teresa

“Men are like fish, neither would get in trouble if they kept their mouths shut!”- Unknown

“A woman’s heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to seek Him just to find her.” – Max Lucado

“To love is to risk not being loved in return.  To hope is to risk pain.  To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.”- Unknown

“For those passionately in love, the whole world seems to smile.” David Myers

‎”It takes a minute to have a crush on someone, an hour to like someone, and a day to love someone… but it takes a lifetime to forget someone.” – Bob Moody

“No act of love is ever wasted”- Geneen Roth

“Just because something happened to you doesn’t mean that you have to repeat it.”- Sergio DeLaMora

“A person’s world is only as big as their heart.”- Tanya A. Moore

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.” Lewis Smedes

“He who is devoid of the power to forgive, is devoid of the power to love.” – Martin Luther King

“You don’t marry someone you can live with, you marry someone you cannot live without.” – Unknown

“The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, ’cause the average guy can see better than he can think!”- Unknown

“Girls are like phones, we love to be held, and talked to.  But, if you push the wrong button…you will be disconnected!”-Unknown

“Love requires so little, and yet……so much.”-Bob Moody

“It’s nice to be important, but it is more important to be nice!”-Unknown.

“The best and most beautiful things cannot be seen or touched, they must be felt with the heart.”-Helen Keller

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” – Martin Luther King Jr.

“A smile is the shortest distance between two people.”-Unknown

“Strangers are friends you just haven’t met yet.” – Unknown

“You have to work to keep love alive; you have to protect it and maintain it, just like you would a delicate flower.”- James Dobson

“True love is not based on luck.  It is a choice and it is a gift.  How will you take care of that gift?” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“For those passionately in love, the whole world seems to smile.” David Myers

“TRUE love is to CHOOSE love, even when you don’t get what you want.” -Julia Shalom Jordan

“LIKING someone and LOVING someone are not the same.  I’m glad God only commanded us to do one of them.”- Julia Shalom Jordan

“Love cannot last without a foundation of forgiveness.”- Dan Allender

“You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving.”- Amy Carmichael

“Grace is favor shown to people who do not deserve any favor at all.” – Martin Lloyd-Jones

“True love is friendship caught on fire.” – Bob Moody

“The best way to GET forgiveness is to GIVE forgiveness.”- Joyce Meyers

“There is no remedy for love but to love more.” – Henry David Thoreau

“It is better to be hated for who you are…than to be loved for someone you are not!” Ryl Omreso

“Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for kindness.”-Lucious Annaeus Seneca

“Whenever you give your time, you are making a sacrifice, and sacrifice is the essence of love.” Unknown

“No man was ever shot doing the dishes.” – Unknown

“Forgiveness is a CHOICE, not a feeling.” – Joyce Meyer

‎”Love is not blind, it simply enables one to see things others fail to see.” Anonymous

“Forgiveness FEELS good, for everyone.”- Julia Shalom Jordan

“God created man before woman.  But, don’t  you always make a rough draft before creating the final masterpiece?” – Unknown

“Greed I’ve often regretted.  Generositiy—never.” – Unknown

“In buying a gift for your wife, practicality can be more expensive than extravagance.”- Unknown

“The happiest people are less forgetting and more forgiving.”- Unknown

“Kindness is actually an investment in your soul.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Love the heart that hurts you, but never hurt the heart that loves you.” Vipin Sharma

“The louder you get the more wrong you sound.” – Unknown

“Deciding not to choose is still making a choice.” – Unknown

“Take away love, and our earth is a tomb.”- Robert Browning

“I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love.”-  Mother Teresa

“Forgiveness is the final form of love.”- Reinhold Niebuhr

“There is no greater beauty than kindness.” –Julia Shalom Jordan

“Since love grows within you, so beauty grows. For love is the beauty of the soul.” St. Augustine

“Having everything your way is highly overrated.”- Joyce Meyer

“Say I love you with your DO.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

‎”Love is when hurting her will hurt you more.”-Unknown

“It’s not how much we do, but how much love we put in the doing. It is not how much we give, but how much love we put in the giving.” – Mother Teresa

“They do not love that do not show their love.” – William Shakespeare

“You don’t marry someone you can live with, you marry someone you cannot live without.” – Unknown

“A person’s world is only as big as their heart.”- Tanya A. Moore

“Love is not a matter of counting the years… But making the years count.” Michelle St. Amand

“United we stand, divided we fall.” – George Washington

“People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered; forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; be kind anyway.

“If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; succeed anyway. If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; be honest anyway.What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; build anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, there may be jealousy; be happy anyway.” – Unknown

“A happy man marries the girl he loves; a happier man loves the girl he marries.” – Unknown

“Nails didn’t hold Jesus to the cross.  Love did.” – Unknown

“If you can’t feed a hundred people, than just feed one.”-Mother Teresa

“Alone we can do so little; together we can do so much.”-Helen Keller

“A smile is the shortest distance between two people.”-Unknown

“It is possible to love without giving, but impossible to love without giving.”-Richard Braunstein

“TRUE love is to CHOOSE love, even when you don’t get what you want.” -Julia Shalom Jordan

“Love looks through a telescope; envy through a microscope.”- Josh Billings

“To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.”- Bill Wilson

“Loving someone is giving them the power to hurt you, but trusting them not to.”- Unknown

“May no gift be too small to give, nor too simple to receive, which is wrapped in thoughtfulness and tied with love.” L.O. Baird

“Forgiveness is the final form of love.” Reinhold Niebuhr

“Take away love, and our earth is a tomb”. Robert Browning

“I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love”. Mother Teresa

“There is no remedy for love but to love more.” Henry David Thoreau

“Some people come into our lives, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never the same.”-Bob Moody

“If you are too busy or too proud to pray with your children, you are too busy and too proud.” -Bill Hybles

“Pride and grace cannot dwell in the same place.”-Pamela Naomih

“Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for kindness.”-Lucious Annaeus Seneca

“Whenever you give your time, you are making a sacrifice, and sacrifice is the essence of love.” Unknown

“It’s nice to be important, but it is more important to be nice!”-Unknown.

“All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.”- Unknown

“You’ll give up on yourself before God will.” – Unknown

“When Jesus went home, he left the door open.” – Unknown

“Love the heart that hurts you, but never hurt the heart that loves you.” Vipin Sharma

“You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving.”- Amy Carmichael

“It requires less character to discover the faults of others, than to tolerate them.”- 
J. Petit Senn

“In prosperity, our friends know us; in adversity, we know our friends.” -
John Collins

“A friend who only tells you what you want to hear is NOT a friend.  He is an enabler.”- Julia Shalom Jordan

“Wanna know what kind of person you are?  Look at your friends.”- Julia Shalom Jordan

“No man is worth your tears, and the one that is, will never make you cry!”- Alice Luna

“People like to bring up your past when your future looks better than theirs.” – Unknown

“Not everyone has good taste; hence not everyone will like you.”- Julia Shalom Jordan

“If you have to chase them, then it’s time to replace them.” – Chris Sandoval

“Fake friends are like shadows, always around on your brightest days, but during your darkest times they are no where to be found.”- Chris Sandoval

“There is no limit to how much a heart can hold, but there is a limit to how much a heart can take.” – Chris Sandoval

“Sometimes I wonder if love is worth fighting for.  Then, I remember your face and I am ready for war.” – Kim Bishop

“I have been on both sides of anger. Neither is fun.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.”- C.S. Lewis

“The next best thing to being wise oneself is to live in a circle of those who are.”- Unknown

“Love what matters, because it is all that matters.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Love don’t cost a thing, except a whole lot of trouble.  It is worth the trouble.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Beauty is only truly appreciated if you have been through hell.”- Julia Shalom Jordan

“Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.”- Jana Stark Sprouse

“Life is not about the people who act true to your face. It’s about the people who remain true behind your back.” Valoree BearChum

“You don’t need someone to complete you. You only need someone to accept you completely.”- Elsa Maldonado

“Don’t hate people because they tell you what your conscience has been saying for a long time.  Thank them.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“If you could kick in the pants the person responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn’t sit for a month.” – Unknown

“You don’t love a woman because she is beautiful, but she is beautiful because you love her.” – Unknown

“For every beauty there is an eye somewhere to see it.  For every truth there is an ear somewhere to hear it.  For every love there is a heart somewhere to receive it.”- Ivan Panin

“Love isn’t finding a perfect person.  It’s seeing an imperfect person perfectly.” Sam Keen

“You know when you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” – Dr. Seuss

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” -Maya Angelou

“Manners don’t cost a thing, so don’t be stingy with them.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“I love you so much I think I might bust…A ryme this time…‘Cause I ain’t got a dime! Thanks, Obama.” –Julia Shalom Jordan

“There is no such thing as committing adultery with the right woman, at the right time, and in the right way, for it is simply WRONG.” – Arisotle

“Surround yourself with people who know your worth.  You don’t need too many people to be happy, just a few real ones who appreciate you for exactly who you are.” – Unknown

“If you are judging people, you will have no time to love them.”
- Mother Teresa

“Some of the greater things are unseen. That’s why you close your eyes when you kiss, cry, or dream.” – Kathy Baker

“A true friend is someone who says nice things behind your back.”- Anthony Hall

“If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate.” Nikka, age 6

“Don’t ever take a fence down, until you know the reason why it was put up.”- Anthony Hall

“Never lie to someone who trusts you; never trust someone who lies to you.” Irish Proverb

“Cute things are always the most trouble.” – Colleen Bajalis

“Stop giving someone else the job of making you happy.” – Joyce Meyer

“When you stop caring, you stop being human.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“You cannot be all things to all people, and that is ALRIGHT.” Michelle McKinney Hammond

“You can’t enjoy your life if you don’t enjoy YOURSELF.” – Joyce Meyer

“Love is it’s own reward.” – P. B. Wilson

“In reality there is perhaps no one of our natural passions so hard to subdue as pride. Disguise it, struggle with it, beat it down, stifle it, mortify it as much as one pleases, it is still alive, and will now and then peek out and show itself.” –Benjamin Franklin

“One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life; that word is love”. Sophocles

“With faith there are no questions, and without faith, there are no answers.” – Unknown Jewish Rabbi

“When a person sends out hate and it is met with love, there’s no contest.  Love is she strongest force on earth.”  – P. B. Wilson

“There are people that are real. There are people that are good.  There are people that are fake. Then, there are those people who are REAL GOOD at being FAKE!” -Chris  Sandoval

“No one ever choked to death swallowing his pride.” – Jody McCann Burns

“If we cannot be a good friend, it does not matter what else we are good at.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Treat people as if they were what they ought to be and you help them to become what they are capable of being.” – Goethe

“Never explain yourself to anyone. The ones who love you don’t need it. The one who don’t love you won’t believe you anyway.”- Michelle McKinnney Hammond

“Sometimes it is not ‘politically correct’ to be a good friend.  Be a good friend anyway.”- Julia Shalom Jordan

“Listening is an important key to HEARING.”- Joyce Meyer

“God made woman beautiful and foolish.  Beautiful so that a man will fall in love with her, and foolish so she will fall in love with him!” – Michelle  Ash

“A happy wife = A happy life.” – VERY WISE unknown man

“The only thing needed for evil to prosper is for good men to do nothing.” – Edmund Burke

“When we begin to celebrate the creativity that God put in each of us and see that we are all unique creations with different things to offer, our insecurities will be gone. People like to control others by keeping them insecure. Don’t let that take you down. Rise up!” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Haters are undercover fans.” – Patricya Krol

“You cannot teach someone something unless he or she has agreed to be your student.” – Rabbi Moishe Rosen

“God will put people in your path that irritate you. Love them anyway.  You are probably an irritant to someone yourself. ” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“You can love me or hate me I promise that it won’t make me or break me.” – Chichi Peacemaker

“Kindness is language that the mute can speak and the deaf can hear.” –Eliset Igat

“Honestly I don’t have time to hate people who hate me, because I’m too busy loving people who love me.” – Sandi Cerreto

“Today’s storm is tomorrow’s rainbow.” – Julia Shalom Jordan“You don’t have to like someone to love them.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“LIKING someone and LOVING someone are not the same. I’m glad God only commanded us to do one of them.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Christ never intended to cover up the dark side of life, but rather to illuminate a path through it.” – Dan Allender

“Sure God created man before woman, but then again you always make a rough draft before creating the final masterpiece.” – Unknown

“Let your test be your testimony and your mess be your message.” – Unknown
“Love cannot last without a foundation of forgiveness.”
- Dan Allender

“Swallow your pride once in awhile, its non-fattening!”
- Diana Wood

“Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.”
- Oscar Wilde

“Love looks through a telescope;envy through a microscope.” – Josh Billings

“What you do with God’s word will determine what He does with you.” – Marc Chilvilon

“When you face adversity, you need to remind yourself that whatever is trying to defeat you could very well be what God will use to promote you.” – Joyce Meyers

“TRUE love is to CHOOSE love, even when you don’t get what you want.” – Julia Shalom Jordan

“Regrets are as personal as fingerprints.” – Margaret Caulkin Banning

“To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.” – Bill Wilson

“Loving someone is giving them the power to hurt you, but trusting them not to.” – Unknown

“May no gift be too small to give, nor too simple to receive, which is wrapped in thoughtfulness and tied with love.” – L.O. Baird
-
”

A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have.” – Thomas Jefferson

“I would rather live believing that Jesus is God and die being wrong; than to not believe and find out that he is.” – Unknown

 

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